Rejected by the field trip committee

March 31, 2008 at 4:03 pm (Uncategorized)

Once again, a Monday where all the kids and the mom oversleep! And not even a spot of sunshine to be found, which means I may have to overdose myself with Zoloft and caffeine to keep moving.

Not only that, but as my second grader was getting dressed, I remembered he had a field trip today, and that I had wanted to chaperone but was passed over for the honor in favor of another parent (hopefully someone more responsible than myself because honestly, I’m not much to talk about lately). The field trip requires the pumpkin-colored field trip shirt, which thank God was clean. We got to school right before the first bell rang and so I couldn’t drop them off in carpool but had to park the car, walk across the road, and take the kids to the door. My four year old insisted on coming along, even though her daddy wanted her to stay home with him since he had to leave for the week.

If you want to slow a four year old down, tell her to hurry her butt up. That guarantees an almost instant stop to whatever’s going on.

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Yesterday I joined a new church. It wasn’t the church I was expecting. I’ve been visiting this place on and off for years, my kids have gone to preschool there for five consecutive years, I even work there on occasion. I’ve taught Vacation bible School there and know half the people in the congregation through Cub Scouts, Girl Scouts, preschool, or elementary school. But for a long time it wasn’t the place for us. I’d been visiting a totally different church for a long time and really felt home there…but my Sunday morning group started to change and there was a lot of pressure on my kids to participate in activities (because we don’t already have enough going on apparently, with piano, baton, Cub Scouts, Girl Scouts, and tball). My across-the-street neighbors and beer brewers that I adore had been telling me about their Sunday morning group for a while and a few weeks ago I visited. It was fabulous. A place where I feel I could really come clean about my struggles with faith in safety. So that sealed it. I know they’re getting new pastors in the summer. I’m okay with the people there now, but I know lots of others haven’t been. As the grown child of a minister, I can tell you that no one is ever happy with whoever’s there.

Anyway, the whole thing with joining the church yesterday had me a bit flustered and embarrassed, but I guess it’s mandatory to be brought up in front of everyone. I felt very welcomed and my kids were red-faced. The fact that there was fried chicken and cupcakes afterwards made it all better for them.

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I’m really ready for a vacation or something. Our tenth wedding anniversary is April 25, and I’d hoped we’d be able to take a short trip together. But my hubby is working his ass off right now trying to stay on top of things, and though we’re technically making more money in this new job it doesn’t work out that way. The way the money comes in is different, and we’re still paying piano, baton, preschool tuition, and then the new mortgage payment is due at a different time than the previous one. So I don’t think we’ll be driving off to the beach for a romantic weekend alone anytime soon. Sad, because we could really use the time together without distractions of home. Maybe this summer, when the sales year ends and before we send our “baby” off to elementary school with her big sister and our son off to the intermediate school.

Life is going to change drastically next year and I kind of regret putting my own intellectual life on the back burner. I am left with an English degree and wimpy brain cells right now. I stand by the choices I made, but I do wish I’d taken myself more seriously in the past. Now I want to make a difference in the world in a different way and have no idea how to do it. If I could find a job alphabetizing, I think I’d be in heaven.